Shadow days

In sailing there is the concept of a "wind shadow" that is created by a sail. Basically, it's simply where the wind is blocked and must flow around. It becomes extremely important in close-quarters racing situations because you can try to block your opponents' wind.

A similar phenomenon is created in karate, for example, when your opponent makes any kind of move whatsoever. Simultaneously an opening is created proportional to how much the move has extended the person. This is why learning how to counter-punch is an absolutely essential skill, because it means you're learning how to take advantage of the special wake created just behind the leading edge your opponent's evil intentions.

Another application of this principle is in preaching. Just behind every phrase or movement is a beat or two of silence that is filled with potential. When I'm really on a roll preaching, that shadow space is essential because it's the beat in which I hear the voice of the congregation and my own inner voice of inspiration. When I see people try to preach without notes and fail, it is often because they don't know how to create and preserve this interior shadow space in the midst of the preaching act. They are all about giving and don't know how to switch into a receiving mode for those crucial few seconds.

I've also come to realize that it takes a courage to trust that something will come in that moment when you take a breath and listen. The truth is usually something does come. And when it doesn't, that's okay, too. If you really throw yourself on the mercy of the Holy Spirit and she doesn't deliver, you have to be okay with Her decision. When that happens to me, I'll often simply repeat my last phrase or summarize what I've been saying, or perhaps just begin the next section of stuff I want to talk about.

An even more ultimate application of this shadow phenomenon is the space created in the wake of psycho-spiritual shifts. It's very common that when something shakes loose in our minds/souls we'll feel tired and quiet in the next moment. It's a mistake as a caregiver to confuse this moment of quietness for backsliding or as an opportunity to push the work further than it has already gone. Even when things seem unresolved, it's often better to let them sit in that place of unsettledness. Attempting to achieve artificial closure is evidence that the caregiver is uncomfortable holding the tension of the scene. Much better to respect the integrity of the spiritual sabbath created by the work.

That period of sabbath can be quite long--lasting minutes, hours, days, or even years. Bede sometimes quotes a Zen teacher who calls it "sheet practice" to spend time simply sleeping and resting. Differentiating this from depression is complicated, and they are certainly related etymologically (having a common origin or process). Anyway, the point I want to make is that this kind of fallow period between moments of growth is a good thing. The fact is that some very important work is often happening under the surface.

I remember a priest friend telling me that the back pews are holy because the people that sit there and disappear before you can speak to them after the service are really engaging important internal work. Forcing them to talk to you is often not helpful.

So this is a relatively long post to explore what should be an intuitive reality. But what often appears intuitive to me is not to others, so I thought I'd talk about it. This shadow business is an incredibly powerful and useful phenomenon to explore in all aspects of life. As key psycho-spiritual dynamics go, it's right up there with the stimulus-response and transcendent-immanent dynamics. Understood dialectically, I guess you would call it movement-stillness? Anyway, these are things I think about when I am trying to analyze what the hell God is doing in the world!

-t